I’m a Teacher

Teacher: I can let you off the hook today, tomorrow, and even the day after tomorrow, but you must remember: I am a teacher, not a fisher. ​​​​

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Gift

A girl asked me to mail something for her. She gave me an empty box and asked me to wrap it up. I asked her out of curiosity, “Who is this box for?” She said, “A guy I have had a crush on for a long time.” I was stunned, “But there’s nothing inside!” She said, “There’s something that only I can see.” Her answer confused me even more. I asked her discreetly what on earth was inside. She said, “A box of wishful thinking.”

拍磚 [pāi zhuān] & 輕拍 [qīng pāi]

拍磚 [pāi zhuān] v. To hit with a brick. To lambaste someone online as if hitting him or her with bricks.

輕拍 [qīng pāi] v. To hit gently. Often included in sentences like “Please hit lightly,” this Internet slang term is often used as a request for mild, constructive criticism from other Internet users when one expresses an opinion that’s potentially controversial. The equivalent in English would be “Don’t be too harsh.”

這是。。。被黑得最慘的一次 [zhè shì…beì hēi de zuì cǎn de yí cì]

這是。。。被黑得最慘的一次 [zhè shì…beì hēi de zuì cǎn de yí cì] <Expression> This is the time when… was roasted/humiliated most seriously. This expression is often used humorously to refer to an often unexpected embarrassing situation where someone or an organization is caught in, especially when they are unintentionally put down.